BECOMING A SPANISH CITIZEN

Because apparently being an ERASMUS EXCHANGE, A BRITISH CITIZEN AND AN EU CITIZEN isn’t enough in Spain. Biggest wild goose chase ever, we traipsed from one government building to another IN TORRENTIAL RAIN (practically the only rain only rain I’ve seen in 7 weeks- typical!) to essentially pay a tax that I didn’t want to pay. Beautiful.

 Eventually- we found the right place, queued for a number, waited our turn to go to the right desk, all the necessary beaurocratic bullshit, only to be told that I didn’t have proof I’m Erasmus. Eventually, I did lose it. My inner essex/ Italian mumma got the better of me. I’m sorry Mr CABRÓN apart from the fact I’m a EU CITIZEN and that I am enrolled at the Uni here, AND that I have both student cards, AND a letter from Southampton (which doesn’t use the word ‘Erasmus’ at all - cheers Tony Campbell)…. YOU ARE STILL NOT CONVINCED IM ERASMUS, YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKIGN KIDDING!! I JUST GOT UP THIS MORNING AND THOUGHT… HMM IM NOT ERASMUS BUT I FANCY GOING TO 4 GOVERNMENT BUILDINGS TO PAY A TAX THAT I DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE TO PAY! Jog on little Spanish man, and take your bloody sombrero with you!!! He had only told me to ‘come back with the appropriate paperwork’. So I calmly told him, my university obviously didn’t issue me the ‘appropriate paper work’, but to take it or leave it because I wasn’t coming back. Essentially – BITE ME!

Once I’d finished my not so elegantly conceived rant he scuttled off to talk to his supervisor and surprise surprise, five minutes later he processed my paperwork no problemo. Turns out being a Spanish citizen is a shitty little laminated card (that I could have made at home), which cost me 10.30 Euros. That’s 5 glasses of wine here with all the free tapas!! BLOODY COUNTRY. Only in Spain.